Fear
by JK Robertson
Summary: A short one-shot for Ulquihime Week 2019 Day Three: Reunion. Ulquiorra asks Orihime to meet him many years after their first meeting, expecting to get shot down. Will he have the courage to say what he wants to say?


"Are you afraid of me, Ulquiorra?" That was the question she asked, sitting across from him in that cafe. What a loaded question it was.

The pale, green-eyed man was generally not afraid of much. He looked at things objectively. He systematically measured an object or idea's merits and demerits, making value determinations based on that which could easily be observed. This was not a scary process. It was easy to make choices in most situations when one did not inject emotion into one's decision-making process.

This woman, however… This long red haired beauty, held an invisible power that did frighten him. She had the power to break him. The power to crush his tightly-held, and often disregarded, hopes to dust. He knew this, and yet _he _had been the one to reach out to her and invite her to this meeting. He looked down at her hands resting on the table, the left resting over the right. There was a band of paler skin encircling her fourth finger. He cleared his throat.

The Orihime Inoue who sat before Ulquiorra today was not the naive girl he has taken to Las Noches. She was not even the vibrant young woman who had recognized and saved him after his soul was reincarnated into a confused plus wandering aimlessly through the streets of Karakura with hollows nipping at his heels.

This Orihime Inoue was tired. She was nearly thirty, and clearly worn down.

She was still so beautiful to him.

He cleared his throat again and asked, realizing that too much time had passed between now and her asking, "What was the question?"

She observed him in a detached manner. Since her engagement had been called off, she had been generally more reserved and cautious. She had let that Shinigami into her heart and he had made use of it, coming and going as he pleased, until he eventually decided to move on to greener, fresher pastures.

She sighed and said, "I asked if you were afraid of me, Ulquiorra. It's been nearly a decade since you started living as a human, and this is the first time you've asked me to meet you. Why is that?"

"Those are two questions, Woman," he answered softly, his eyes still trained on her hands. "To answer the first," he began, pausing to allow his eyes to slowly rise to meet hers, "Yes." There was a long pause as he allowed his eyes to penetrate the woman's. "To answer the second, it is because of the first." His eyes remained on hers for a moment longer before returning to her hands.

Orihime did not know how to respond. To her surprise, his answer hurt her. She thought that her heart had hardened over the course of the last year or so, at least to the point that his simple words would have no power over her. And yet, she felt a chill settle over her chest and a stab in her belly. "I'm sure I've done nothing to warrant you being afraid of me. I—"

"Woman," he cut in. She was reacting as could be expected, of course, but it would be counterproductive to allow her to continue on this path. Ulquiorra braced himself with a slow inhale. He could do this. He'd been waiting twelve years for this conversation. He'd rehearsed and visualized how this would go. It was simple. He swallowed twice. "Why?"

Orihime sat back slightly, silenced by his open question. Why, indeed? Why had she agreed to this meeting? Why had she seemingly gone about her life like he didn't exist? Why had she helped him all those years ago? Why did she waste so many years with the Shinigami? Why?

"Why what, Ulquiorra?" She would not be made to guess.

"Why did you reach back?"

His eyes pierced hers and she found herself unable to look away. Despite their startling color and intensity, she found no hardness in them. "I-" her voice caught in her throat. He wasn't asking her about any of her many regrets. "-I wanted to."

His eyes fell. Of course. It had been a simple impulse. He was foolish to believe that there was anything meaningful behind the gesture. He inhaled slowly and nodded. "I understand. I'm sorry for bothering you, Wo- Miss Inoue."

Was he…? Yes. He was standing. He was going to leave. He was going to leave her again.

Her breath sped up. No. No, this couldn't happen again. Not this time. Orihime's heart thumped hard in her chest as her hand darted out, her body twisting over the table between them to grasp his hand.

It was warm.

Thick, dark brows rose and a sharp, pale chin slowly turned toward the point of contact between them. He felt the blood beneath the skin of his gigai surge and heat as he came to realize what she had done. This time when he asked the question, it was only a whisper.

"Why?"

"I, uh, I… Don't leave. Please. I promise, I'll answer your questions. Just…" Orihime's eyes closed and reopened, focusing on where she touched him. "Just stay with me."

He felt a prickling sensation behind the bridge of his nose. Why should her words affect him so? Surely she only meant for the moment. She probably wanted to avoid an embarrassing social situation. "As you wish, Woman," he answered, sitting again.

To his surprise, she did not immediately let go.

To her surprise, she held on. She held her breath for a moment, then released it, returning his question.

"Why?"

Deep brown eyes found his, searching, digging, wishing. She found herself unable to take a full breath. He had asked her here for a purpose. She desperately wanted to know what that was.

Ulquiorra frowned for a moment, feeling exposed. His head slowly turned back and forth as he realized he had nothing. Nothing to lose, and nothing to gain by concealing the truth from her. He wasn't sure that she would understand, as he spoke in his soft, deep timbre, "There has always been something intangible that divides us. I woke from a dream this morning in which that barrier had turned to ash and blew away on a breeze. I have called you here to see with my own eyes whether this dream was merely a meaningless sleep image, or if it foretold something; some human cue I failed to realize during my waking hours."

Orihime's eyes widened slowly at his mysterious explanation. So he went to sleep, woke up, tracked her down, and called her up to see if his dream made sense? It seemed far-fetched. There had to be something more to this. "And?" she asked after several moments of silence.

"I was right," he replied, bringing his other hand up to hers to trace the fair skin around her fourth finger. "Have you abandoned your hope in the Shinigami?"

"Yes," she answered, slightly breathless as she watched his finger touch her hand.

"It's here, you know. It's still here where I left it," he said so softly it that was hard to perceive the words.

She didn't know how, but she knew. A rushing, swelling feeling filled her chest and she blinked quickly. "I've kept it," she whispered. "I've always kept it."

The former Espada's face tilted slightly. "You should have told me sooner. I should have listened," he said as though he were talking to the shadows of their younger selves, not exactly addressing the woman sitting across from him.

"You couldn't. You were too far away from me. You were always afraid, weren't you?" Orihime asked, her fingers relaxing between his hands as she waited for his response.

"I was," he admitted, looking back to her face, talking to the woman before him instead of to the memory of a sixteen-year-old girl. "I am not far away now."

That's right. Ulquiorra _was_ here. He had asked her here because he would not let this chance pass him by. It was now or never.

"I understand what it means, now." He let his fingers curl between hers. He swallowed. Hard. He prepared for rejection, holding his breath and pursing his lips.

A soft breath puffed out of the redhead's cheeks, and the smile that she thought she had lost over the years blossomed on her face. "I'm not afraid, Ulquiorra. I've never been afraid of you. Why have you asked me here?"

"I have come…" He was afraid to look at her. _Still_, he was afraid. Now more than ever, he was afraid. He could barely hear his own thoughts as he voiced them, his heartbeat sounded so loud in his ears. "I have come, Woman," he swallowed again, and this time, when he spoke, he looked her in the eyes. "I have come to ask for your heart in return."

* * *

Like my stories? Let me know!


End file.
